Why You Should Stop Saying You Don’t Have Time

I recently met up with some girlfriends, after what felt like an eternity. Amidst the small talk, a few similarities emerged:

“I feel bad leaving my baby at home with my husband.” “I need to get groceries but should probably get back home.” “I would love to stay but I feel guilty.” “I wanted to go to yoga tomorrow but since I went out tonight, I probably won’t.”

I told them I’ve been wanting to take a bubble bath since Christmas. It was February at the time. Really, Janey? You couldn’t find 15 minutes within 35 days to take a damn bath?! Pathetic.

In parallel fashion, a male colleague encouraged me to start a mastermind. It sounded like a good idea but then I thought, “I won’t be able to find any women who are willing to commit to that sort of thing. Heck, I don’t know if I’m willing to sacrifice 1 night/week away from my family.”

When it comes down to choosing between another obligation and our family, most of us, especially women, put our family first. Which isn’t a bad thing, but then we don’t ever do the things we really want to!

In fact, 61% of women say that they don't have enough time to do what they want, compared to 48% of men. (Gallup)

Well, people are working more hours and busier than ever, duh. Hmm.. let’s ponder that for a moment. In the United States, 86% of men and 67% percent of women work more than 40 hours/week. These figures have been pretty consistent for the past 50 years. Additional research shows annual work hours in the U.S. have NOT increased in the past few decades.

Then why do we all feel so busy? The reason is our world has shifted from resource-based to knowledge-based and therefore, time has become more valuable. For example, a farmer must wait for his crops and livestock to grow. Corporations with automatic, cloud-based processes have an infinite number of emails, meetings, and calls. As finite humans, we feel like we can never keep up, which actually perpetuates the situation. Feeling overwhelmed causes us to make poor time-management decisions (BBC). We over-commit, don’t use our free time wisely, and the cycle continues.

Let’s go back to my bath example. Why didn’t I ever make time to pamper myself? (A bath and face mask is considered a life of luxury to me.) My excuse was I have a lot going on: a full-time job, a side business, blogging, finishing our basement, leading a mastermind, writing a book, being a wife and mother, and so on. Yet, I still found time to watch all 8 seasons of the Game of Thrones within 2 months. I know, embarrassing. I’m blushing as I type this.

Here’s the deal, guys. If we are watching TV and checking social media, we are not allowed to say we don’t have time to do what we want.

Now you’re thinking, “I’m exhausted after work and just want to binge for a few minutes without using my brain or any energy.” I get it; I feel that way sometimes too. So I ask myself, “Will this fill my cup? Will I feel confident, fulfilled, and at peace afterward? Will this make me a better person?”

Let’s make a promise to ourselves: less TV, less social media, more reading, more exercising, more time with friends, [or whatever it is you love], and NO MORE excuses!

For more time management and mindfulness techniques, check out my daily journal below. You can also get 10% off my favorite planner, complete with goals, to-do’s, gratitude, and reflection prompts.

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